8 Best Self Esteem Therapeutic Activities to Try Today

Takeaway: If you struggle with self esteem, you’re not alone. Thankfully, with practice and intention, it is possible to build confidence. Here, I share some of my favorite therapy activities for self esteem to help you start feeling better about yourself.

Now more than ever, it can be difficult to cultivate healthy self-esteem. Social media and the internet in general can fuel our natural tendency to compare ourselves to others, and too often, we see ourselves as falling short.

As a clinical psychologist who specializes in low self esteem therapy, I've seen firsthand how painful it can be to struggle with self confidence. At the same time, I've also seen that it's possible to get to the root of these issues and silence your inner critic.

That's why I created this list of self esteem activities for you to try at home today. While they're not a replacement for therapy, they can be a helpful first step (or supplement your work in counseling). Next time you notice feeling down on yourself, try one of my exercises.

Who are these self-esteem therapy activities for?

In my practice, I specialize in helping young adults. However, these activities can help anyone who wants to build self esteem. These strategies are meant to serve as an easy and accessible way to start feeling better about yourself little by little. Again, they're not meant to replace mental health care or crisis services.

If you or someone you know is in crisis and needs urgent support, please contact 988 or visit your local crisis center or emergency room.

How can therapy activities for self esteem help?

While these exercises won't give you high self esteem overnight, they can help you

Begin to respect yourself,
Connect and honor your true self,
Build self compassion, and
Heal your inner critic.

Remember, boosting self esteem is a process, and it takes time and energy to change the way you think and feel about yourself. Don't give up! You're worth the effort.

A clinical psychologist's 8 favorite self esteem activities for adults

Building self confidence is a personal journey, so what works for one person may not work for another. Try out each of these activities to discover which ones feel best for you.

Identify and Acknowledge Your Emotions through journaling

This might seem like a strange #1 for building self esteem but as a self esteem therapist I believe a great first step thing that can help build confidence in yourself is acknowledging how you feel. When you have low self esteem - you are often beating yourself up and tearing yourself down, which means that you probably don't feel worthy of having most of your feelings.

But trying to change this narrative could really change the way you feel about yourself. This doesn't have to be complicated. Even just being able to say to yourself - "I feel sad" or "I feel angry." You don't have to then justify these feelings. You don't have to go into them.

Just allowing yourself to feel them and allow yourself to have them can be a big step towards starting to change the way you treat yourself.

Then the next step could be to begin to ask yourself what these emotions are trying to communicate to you. This is a harder step because then you might need to start acknowledging difficulties in relationships or your outside world, which is really difficult for people who struggle with self esteem but is a crucial next step.

Fostering this self awareness can be help you on your journey to increasing self esteem.

2. Understand Your relationship with Anger

Again, probably the last thing you would imagine me to say in this blog about self esteem activities. But I promise you, if you struggle with low self esteem - you struggle with anger. When you have low self esteem - you often feel awful about yourself, beat yourself up, often have self critical thoughts, feel like you aren't worth anything.

If you think about these things, they are inherently aggressive. And this aggression was learned somewhere. You didn't come out of the womb hating yourself. Instead, you probably felt angry or upset about something going on around you but didn't feel safe to have these feelings.

So you learned to turn these emotions towards yourself. Yes, you might be angry at yourself at times. Yes, you might mess up to the point you are soooooo disappointed in yourself. But is it normal for this to be the norm? Absolutely not.

The most likely case is that things around you are upsetting you and you are relying on this old defense of turning it against yourself. Being angry at yourself can feel SOOO much safer than feeling it towards someone else.

The kicker is that this also will 1000000% ruin your self esteem. It is impossible to have a positive self image if you are unable to feel and process anger towards others and only can feel it towards yourself.

I am sure you are convincing yourself right now that this isn't the case for you. You aren't an angry person. You don't struggle with anger. But I promise you that if you are saying these things, anger is in there and it is trapped. Finding a way to understand it and process it will be crucial to changing your relationship with yourself.

This doesn't have to be complicated. It doesn't mean you have to become your parent who yelled and screamed at everyone when they were angry. It just means that you need to find another way to deal with your anger besides attacking yourself. This might mean getting a therapist to help you process because it feels to scary to process on your own.

The best thing you can do is to be open and begin to notice the idea that you beating yourself up might mean you are angry about something. This an incredible activity you can do for your self esteem.

3. Follow through on your promises to yourself to increase self-respect

Staying consistent with yourself is a great way to build self esteem. Even seemingly small commitments like doing a 10-minute yoga practice in the morning or getting into bed by a certain time are opportunities to follow through on your promises to yourself.

Following through on promises to yourself also helps you respect yourself. Respect is an important part of self esteem. Think about someone you deeply respect and think about how you treat them. Or maybe think about someone you know that you think respects themselves. Imagine how they might treat themselves. And then think about how you can begin to treat yourself this way.

Over time, this can foster a sense of trust that you have your own back, which can contribute to your self worth.

4. Connect with your body through Yoga

Yoga is so much more than just stretching. Yoga is a moving meditation and a way to deeply connect with yourself. If you struggle with self esteem, then I can imagine you struggle to connect with yourself. To be aware of yourself. To be aware of how you are feeling. To be aware of your body and the sensations that are coming up.

If you are someone who also struggles with your self esteem with your body, you might really struggle with caring for your body, which is an important part of your self esteem. It is important to find the right teacher- one that is less about diet culture and toxic fitness practices.

But if you find a good yoga teacher, during the classes they will invite you to listen to yourself. To honor what your body is telling you. That doing the poses the way that is best for your body is celebrated - that you don't have to try and force yourself to be a certain way to do yoga.

Sometimes with exercise, people can want to dominate their body. They want to shape it and control it into the image that they think will make themselves feel better (especially if they have low self esteem). But a good yoga teacher will help you move away from this and begin to honor your body and love it for what it can do, while also helping your body to grow and heal.

If you have struggled with chronic low self esteem, then I can imagine you are severely disconnected from yourself. Sometimes trying to connect to your emotions through journaling is hard. So doing something like yoga can be a helpful in-between. It can help you begin the process of awareness. It can help you begin to notice yourself. Connecting with your body is an incredible way to build self esteem.

5. Self esteem worksheets

If a written activity is more your style, consider trying a worksheet. There are tons of free self esteem worksheets available on Therapist Aid and other websites. Some may help you identify where negative self talk is showing up in your life while others may help you identify your strengths and other positive qualities.

There is no one size fits all when it comes to healing your self esteem and so finding the first step that allows you to begin this process is crucial. Maybe doing a free style journal about your feelings doesn't feel safe yet, so having something like a worksheet can be structured enough to get you started.

Find the worksheets that resonate with you!

6. Self-Compassion mantras

Saying self-compassion mantras to yourself in the mirror can feel cheesy, but it can be an effective way to grow your self esteem. Shame is at the root of self esteem issues. And the antidote to low self esteem is self-compassion.

Being able to accept and embrace yourself despite whatever your low self esteem is convincing you to hate. Here is a helpful article that goes into some mantras you can use to help build your self compassion.

Keep in mind that this doesn't need to be forcing toxic positivity on yourself. It can be something as simple as, "I will get through this," or "It's part of being human." You may not fully believe it at first—and that's okay—but stay consistent and notice how it feels over time.

You can use these in so many ways. The best way I have found is to have one or two mantras at the ready so that when you begin to notice that very loud inner critic, you can have a mantra to repeat to yourself. You can also couple this with some deep breathing.

So you can repeat to yourself "I deserve kindness in this moment" while taking 4 slow deep breaths. Then when you are done, move onto something else. Activitively get yourself to think about something else or to do something else. This can help begin to rewire your brain towards a more positive coping style.

6. Intentional social media use

Social media can be a source of both connection and comparison. It may be worth it to go through the accounts you follow on social media and remove any that don't make you feel good about yourself. You don't need to follow anyone that makes you feel bad!

This means people who promote hating your body, are trying to sell you something to change yourself like a new diet or exercise program, or even people who often criticize or make fun of other people.

Something that recently came up on my TikTok was someone making fun of people who got these neon signs for their wedding and they were grammatically incorrect. They were really hounding on how "stupid" these people were. I quickly blocked this creator and said I was un-interested in this kind of content.

If you want to change your self esteem, setting boundaries on whose voices you allow into your account can be life changing.

7. Find a sense of purpose through volunteering

While we want to avoid comparing ourselves to others, it can help to focus our attention on others for the purpose of getting out of our own heads. Volunteering for a cause you care about can help channel your energy into the greater good rather than getting caught up in self doubt. It can also foster a sense of community and build your relationships.

When we focus on helping others, it can help us begin to see ourselves in a larger context. This might not be the first activity I would try out if you really struggle with low self esteem, but it is one to keep in mind if you are on your healing journey and want to go to the next level!

8. Learn how to self-soothe

Of course, no one wants to feel bad about themselves. However, it might not be realistic to avoid these feelings for good. No matter how much inner work we do, feelings of rejection, failure, and other uncomfortable emotions may still arise.

Healthy self esteem does not being that you never have bad feelings about yourself. But it is the ability to care for yourself despite whatever happens or whatever feeling arises.

I encourage you to find activities to help you soothe these feelings when they come up. Everyone is different, so what works best for you may be different than what works for others. However, some ideas to try are taking deep breaths, listening to calming music, or taking a walk.

When self help strategies for low self esteem aren't enough: Advice from a therapist

These strategies can all help you on your journey toward self acceptance. However, as I mentioned at the beginning of this post, they're not a replacement for working with a mental health professional.

Here are some signs that you could benefit from working with a therapist to build a more positive self image:

You only focus on your negative qualities.
You have a hard time accepting positive feedback or compliments.
You don't trust your decisions.
You struggle with negative body image.
You don’t know how to stop blaming yourself.
You have difficulty feeling positive about your future.

These are just a few signs that I recommend therapy for improving self esteem.

Get the personalized support you need to grow your self esteem.

Right now, it might feel impossible to imagine feeling anything other than bad about yourself. I understand: many of my clients feel this way when we first start working together. However, I'm here to tell you that it is possible to develop a healthy sense of self esteem, even if that feels out of reach.

Hi, I am Dr. Ann Krajewski and I take an in-depth approach to self esteem therapy to help my clients reclaim their voice. If you are located in Washington DC, Virginia, or Washington state, reach out today to start your healing journey. Together, we'll get to the root of the negative core beliefs that drive your negative self talk. We'll also process any past experiences that have contributed to these beliefs, and we'll discuss whether your personal values actually align with these beliefs.

Through this process, you'll be able to make deep, lasting changes around how you feel about yourself and finally be the confident, empowered person you've always dreamed of becoming.

get started today

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